Fantastic Friiiiday!

So, I was stumbling and came across this video...it has officially made my entire lifetime. Enjoy!

Wednesday Wonderings

1.) Why is Nickelodeon bringing back Kenan and Kel when there are so many other great shows they are ignoring?

2.)Why do more guys try to date you when you're taken than when you're single?

3.)Why can't I find a straight, male friend to cuddle with, who will not try to have sex with me?

4.) Why do people always ask for advice, when what they really want is someone to agree with them?

5.) Why is it that when you tell someone that something is broken, they have to try it one time before they say "Yup, it's broken"?

6. Why is it so much harder to forget those that deserve/need to be forgotten than those that don't really matter?

I am

I'm feeling contemplative, so I wrote this a few minutes ago:

I am...
A lioness, prowling through the hazy African sunset
A flame, growing steadily, enveloping everything in my path
The most exquisite gemstone; bask in my amber hued radiance

I am...
The most delicate of silks; revel in the way I feel against your skin
The most sensuous of rose petals; let me soothe your weary flesh
The most resilient of metals, only changed by heat and passion

I am...
A daughter, always learning
A wife, always loving
A warrior, without rest
A woman

If I Ruled the World...

The past few weeks have been EXTREMELY eventful...my entire life did a 360 and flipped itself around completely in about 3 weeks time. Now I'm biding time. I'm getting myself together...mind, body, and soul. I DEFINITELY need to start taking better care of myself and I need to get stronger. The fact that I've stopped putting chemicals in and on my body is causing me to make great strides. My skin has never looked healthier, my hair is absolutely beautiful in all it's tightly coiled glory and my health is MUCH better. I heal faster than before as well, probably because I stopped taking all those medications and various other things.

I am on top of the world. My happiness and my hope knows no bounds. I feel as if I could walk through fire and remain unharmed. It's almost like I've finally realized what it means to be alive. We go through hardships and trials because without them, true happiness and growth would not exist. I'm glad I realized it and can now start living without holding back!

There's Just Something About a...

It's no secret that I'm a bit partial to men who are in the military. I think it's the discipline and strength that that particular career requires. I'm partial to the military men in my life, and there are a LOT of them (significant other, exes, uncles, friends, etc.) As bad as it sounds, you're more likely to treasure those who can be taken from you easily; which is probably why these men in my life are the most important to me.

As I've said before and I will say it again: it takes a certain type of courage and dedication to enlist in any branch of the military. These people are willing to lay their lives on the line to protect and serve their country. I am continuously amazed at how making a soldier brings out the very best and worst qualities in a person and molds them into what is most useful/functional for the job they have to do. It took some serious psychological development and experimentation to create that system. I definitely respect whoever developed that process. It is true that you cannot make something out of nothing, so there are certain qualities that they look for that make a good soldier. It just blows my mind that there are so many people in my life who possess those qualities that I would have never thought it possible.

Grudges?

It is time for me to become a more forgiving person. There was a point in my life that all the unhappiness was due to some grudge I held. That definitely needed to change. I don't really hold grudges anymore, but I still tend to focus on the negative aspects of a situation. That needed to change in order for me to relax and be able to forgive people for whatever wrong they did. Many times, the treatment from these other people was purely due to selfishness and the lack of respect for another human being. Sure, I may still be a bit angry, but it's all a process of letting it go.

To develop as a good person, one must keep a sound mind and a clear conscience. This is my main reason for letting go of grudges I have. My task for today is to get rid of old anger or hurt feelings that are associated with other people. As long as my conscience is clear and I can't hold in my anger, I can still change and grow as a woman.

Time, Choices, and Destiny

We knew from the beginning that this was not your average relationship...we knew, but were not prepared to accept our roles. We knew that the power to hold and treasure each other above all else needed to be nurtured and needed to grow as time went on. We knew that others...past relationships served a specific purpose; we knew why it never worked out with the others. Those others were not meant to be. We have finally realized that the concept of "us" has not wavered; it has just evolved a bit. Destiny isn't something that changes...one can either accept it and develop in it, or fight it and suffer.

When you finally discover that you are on the right path and have made the correct decisions for your destiny, things will fall into place. Things will be laid out for you. They may not be simple and they may not be enjoyable, but it is your journey. I am on the right path to who I am intended to be...I have not become that woman just yet, but I'm very close to evolving into her. As long as I follow where I am led, I will accomplish my tasks.

Mine is a heart of carnelian, crimson as murder on a holy day.
Mine is a heart of corneal, the gnarled roots of a dogwood and the bursting of flowers.
I am the broken wax seal on my lover's letters.
I am the phoenix, the fiery sun, consuming and resuming myself.
I will what I will.
Mine is a heart of carnelian, blood red as the crest of a phoenix.

Photo courtesy of Michael Bailey---google him, his artwork is AMAZING!

CD MeMe

I was tagged in this note on Facebook and I thought that I'd share it and tag two of my favorite bloggers so: A Passive Observer, Marissa Littleton ....YOU HAVE BEEN TAGGED!

I'm pretty sure all of you know I listen to a large volume of music, coming from an amazing amount of varying genres. Below you will find 5 of my favorite CD's of all time.

If you are tagged in this note, you are charged with posting your top 5 CD's of all time, and tagging at least 2 people. Have fun, good luck. :D

Top 5 CD's of All Time (Not in any particular order)

1. Lauryn Hill-The Miseducation of Lauryn Hill
2. Fall Out Boy-Infinity on High
3. Gym Class Heroes-The Papercut Chronicles
4. Incubus-Make Yourself
5. Linkin Park-EVERY ALBUM

Home Sweet Home...

I am OFFICIALLY back in Kalamazoo. I got back yesterday around noon after Marcel decided to get up and hit the highway. He's is just about the best friend ever for that one. It feels so good to be home. My mother had her little comments about my hair, but that was expected. Barsen showed up somewhere around the first 5 minutes I was home, the normal cuddling commenced. Not much happening around here...just the way I LOVE it. I made flautas for dinner last night, made with home-made tortillas. Yes...I am AMAZING. My tortillas are something serious, especially now that I'm using whole wheat. The cats are doing well. They like being in a familiar setting. For Bella, this was just about her first "forever home". She's sitting in my lap at this particular moment, purring her little fuzzy butt off. Well, I'm going to head back to sleep just because...well...I CAN! I am completely relaxed for the first time in MONTHS.

My Favorite Poem

Have you ever heard or read a poem that you just couldn't live without? The words just seem to vibe with your very soul? There is a poem that Maya Angelou wrote that she read in Tyler Perry's movie, Ma'dea's Family Reunion that is absolutely beautiful. It captures my relationship perfectly, only in someone else's words. Here it is. Enjoy!

The sun has come.
The mist has gone.
We see in the distance...
Our long way home.
I was always yours to have.
You were always mine.
We have loved each other in and out of time.

When the first stone looked up at the blazing sun
And the first tree struggled up from the forest floor
I had always loved you more.

You freed your braids...
Gave your hair to the breeze.
It hummed like a hive of honeybees.
I reached in the mass for the sweet honeycomb there....
Mmmm...God how I loved your hair.

You saw me bludgeoned by circumstance.
Lost, injured, hurt by chance.
I screamed to the heavens, loudly screamed....
Trying to change our nightmares into dreams...

The sun has come.
The mist has gone.
We see in the distance our long way home.
I was always yours to have.
You were always mine.
We have loved each other in and out
In and out
In and out
Of time.

Life is Beautiful!

Things in my life are fitting together incredibly beautifully. I'm leaving CMU to branch out and do me! I'm so excited. This job is saving my ass right now. The best feeling in the world is that I don't have to deal with any more drama/bullshit. I am completely focused on myself and those I love right now. I'm coming up to CMU periodically just to visit friends, but it's going to feel so good to be back in K-zoo where I know I am safe and loved. The stress and drama that I had to deal with at Central is of no importance at all anymore. Honestly if I don't feel the need to deal with someone, I won't. I will keep them around for networking purposes, but if they caused issues in my life...they aren't of much importance in the first place. I'm going to tell them the same thing that Eron's aunt told the telemarketers, "Ah, go to shit!"

Snarkiness aside, there are a TON of people that I'm going to miss. Their presence in my life is enough to make my days easier and a lot brighter. They are those I may call family. My roomates are my girls, I'm DEFINITELY going to miss them. Thank God, I'm coming up to spend time with them and ish every few weekends or so. I'd be going through withdrawals otherwise. I'm definitely going to miss everyone that has importance in my life.

Right now, I'm relaxing and letting bachata soak into my veins. This is the best type of music if you need to pause and reflect. True most of the songs are incredibly sad, but beautiful. Aventura is my favorite bachata artist EVER. Most of his stuff is about love lost, but it's fabulous when you need to mellow out after a hard day.

I really do just want to be back in Kalamazoo right now...I can't WAIT until his week is over! If you're in the area, the Thursday after whatever night I come home we're going to be at Tortilla Flats that night for SALSA/BACHATA/MERENGUE NIGHT! Come through and welcome me back home!

All I Want for Christmas...

This past week has been REALLY rough. For most students, this week is finals week. It is not for me, since I took my finals last Thursday and Friday so I could leave when I wanted to. If I had a choice, I would have left on Saturday. I want to be back in Kalamazoo. My roomates had a goodbye party for me, that also doubled as Ashley's 21st birthday party. It was SO much fun! I have a really funny video that I posted on YouTube that is our friend, Adam wrestling with some other kid in the parking lot of our apartment complex. I'm in the middle of arguing with my dad about getting my car fixed, he isn't trying to hear it. I keep telling him that I need my car back soon so I can get to Kalamazoo and get things started with work! He is aggravation personified. It's just $1500! I told him that I can pay him back after my first couple weeks of work. It's what I need for right now...the only thing wrong with the car is the transmission. Everything else is in good condition.

Well, like I told you all before I am preparing for the move back to Kalamazoo. I'm really excited to be with my loved ones, but I'm not sure how I feel about moving back in with my mother and stepdad. Even my stepdad said it, "After about 3 months, normally you and your mom are trying to kill each other." I don't think it will be as bad this time, since I won't be at the house nearly as often. Well, since I'm back at home for this Christmas, I've decided that I'm going to make a list of things that I would love for the holiday!

1.) Someone to do a cheap transmission repair for my car
2.) Gas money to get back to Kalamazoo
3.) Time with my sisters
4.) A TON of time with my honey (I know I'm going to get this anyway, but it couldn't hurt)
5.) A wonderful family dinner with ALL my Mom's siblings and their kids
6.) Someone to buy all this stuff from me so it will be easier to move

Here's the video from this weekend: